Brave Donald Vows To Buy A Tesla Over ‘Illegal’ Boycott Of Elon’s Company

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Leon Musk had a bad day yesterday with his Tesla stocks falling faster than Melania on allowance day, and his social media platform, Twitter, suffered through DDOS attacks on Monday. Meanwhile, SpaceX’s first two launches of its giant Starship rocket have blown up, raining debris on the planet. According to CNN, Tesla shares plunged 15% and erased the last of their post-Election Day gains.

According to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index, Elon lost $29 billion in net worth on Monday alone. That’s a shame, but the brave US president is stepping up to support the wealthy welfare queen by vowing to buy a Tesla. I’ve never seen Donald drive, have you?

“To Republicans, Conservatives, and all great Americans, Elon Musk is “putting it on the line” in order to help our Nation, and he is doing a FANTASTIC JOB!” Lumpy wrote on Truth Social. “But the Radical Left Lunatics, as they often do, are trying to illegally and collusively boycott Tesla, one of the World’s great automakers, and Elon’s “baby,” in order to attack and do harm to Elon, and everything he stands for.”

“They tried to do it to me at the 2024 Presidential Ballot Box, but how did that work out?” It added. “In any event, I’m going to buy a brand new Tesla tomorrow morning as a show of confidence and support for Elon Musk, a truly great American. Why should he be punished for putting his tremendous skills to work in order to help MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN???”

It is not illegal to boycott a company, and he knows that. The Tesla takedown is working. Just ask Elon who thanked Donald for allegedly buying a Tesla today. Allegedly!